January 19, 2018
Aziz Ansari, whose LinkedIn account boasts “super woke male feminist” under featured skills, found himself the subject of controversy after Babe.net published an article detailing his date with an anonymous photographer.
According to Grace (the anonymous identity) on Babe, she met Ansari at a 2017 Emmy Awards after-party. After the two flirted for a while, Aziz took down her contact information; they later arranged a date.
Grace called it “the worst date in her life.” The date began with Grace arriving at the comedian’s apartment where they had drinks before heading to an oyster bar.
Treating the dinner part of their evening as mere formality and precursor to coitus, Ansari hastily rushed to get the check.
“When the waiter came over he quickly asked for the check and he said like, ‘Let’s get off this boat.’” She recalls there was still wine in her glass and more left in the bottle he ordered. The abruptness surprised her.”
After the nominal dinner, Grace followed Ansari back to his apartment where intimacy quickly escalated.
“He said something along the lines of, ‘How about you hop up and take a seat?’” Within moments, he was kissing her. “In a second, his hand was on my breast.” Then he was undressing her, then he undressed himself. She remembers feeling uncomfortable at how quickly things escalated.
Minutes after first kissing her, Ansari told her he was reaching for a condom. Grace quickly interjected, “Whoa, let’s relax for a sec, let’s chill.” The comedian continued,
”She says he then resumed kissing her, briefly performed oral sex on her, and asked her to do the same thing to him. She did, but not for long. “It was really quick. Everything was pretty much touched and done within ten minutes of hooking up, except for actual sex.”
The remainder of the night went on in the same fashion,
“The move he kept doing was taking his two fingers in a V-shape and putting them in my mouth, in my throat to wet his fingers, because the moment he’d stick his fingers in my throat he’d go straight for my vagina and try to finger me.”
Ansari also physically pulled her hand towards his penis multiple times throughout the night, from the time he first kissed her on the countertop onward. “He probably moved my hand to his dick five to seven times,” she said. “He really kept doing it after I moved it away.”
But the main thing was that he wouldn’t let her move away from him. She compared the path they cut across his apartment to a football play. “It was 30 minutes of me getting up and moving and him following and sticking his fingers down my throat again. It was really repetitive. It felt like a fucking game.
You can read the remainder of the account here (spoiler alert: it doesn’t get better).
Before heading home from Ansari’s apartment, crying, in an Uber, Ansari asked Grace several more times, “where do you want me to f—k you?” before Grace performed oral on him (for the second time), made out, and watched an episode of Seinfeld (At this point Ansari must have somehow finally sensed Grace’s woes, and opted not to subject her to watching his Aziz Ansari: Live Netflix Special). That concluded her evening.
There are a few key takeaways here.
First, Grace should have never gone to Ansari’s apartment on a first date, to begin with; once at Ansari’s apartment, Grace should’ve left when she began to feel uncomfortable.
Grace’s motivations for choosing (keyword here is choosing) to remain in Ansari’s abode are unclear. Perhaps it was the allure of Ansari’s celebrity title that kept her there, but the bottom line is her stay was consensual.
Moreover, nothing Ansari did (and for those ready to accuse me of shaming the victim; I’ll get to Ansari in a moment) crossed the border separating sexually bellicose and criminal. It would be both wrong and irresponsible to lump Grace in with the victims of Louise CK, Kevin Spacey, or Harvey Weinstein – and neither the author nor Grace makes an effort to do so. #MeToo is not once mentioned in the article.
As for Ansari himself, his conduct was profoundly licentious and damaging to his date (she wasn’t crying in the Uber because she realized the lobster rolls at the oyster bar weren’t fat-free). Made evident by his rush to get the check, Aziz had no interest in getting know let alone actually “date” his date. He was interested in sleeping with her.
Especially striking is the contrast between Ansari’s self-promoted persona of feminist social justice guru, and… Aziz Ansari himself. On David Letterman (circa 2014) Ansari postured as feminist, “You’re a feminist if you go to a Jay Z and Beyoncé concert, and you’re not like, ‘Mmm, I feel like Beyoncé should get 23 percent less money than Jay Z.”
Chiding President Trump on SNL, Ansari literally likened him to a woman beater, calling Trump “the Chris Brown of politics”. (I’m sure Ansari was both shocked and appalled by the 13-year-old recording of Trump bragging about “grabbing women by the p**sy,” as he was allegedly doing the exact same thing to Grace)
There’s a big difference between actually respecting the opposite sex, and parroting talking points from the feminist bulletin board while eschewing any vestiges of chivalry. The spread of far-left feminism in today’s culture has cultivated the latter while dismissing the former as “toxic masculinity.” It turns out that the gregarious, gentlemanly conduct that deep down all women covet in their male counterparts is an inseparable component of masculinity. It’s what separates good men from sleazeballs like Ansari. The far-left feminist cabal’s inane crusade on masculinity has blurred this distinction. (Gee, what a great idea that was, thank goodness more men don’t behave like Mike Pence!)
Aside from fundamentally failing to inculcate men to behave as men, Ansari’s flavor of feminist dogma has alleviated responsibility from women in making good decisions by branding even the most tepid critics as vile “slut shamers” (there’s no reason one can’t acknowledge that Ansari’s deportment was vile, while also recognizing that perhaps Grace could have left his presence earlier). Grace was as much a victim of the feminist hookup culture instilled by Ansari’s feminism as she was of Ansari himself.
It’s important to keep in mind that every incident can’t be lumped into one: Harvey Weinstein, Louis CK, and Ansari; sexual assault is a grave criminal offense, whilst behavior akin to Ansari’s is not a crime. That doesn’t mean it isn’t susceptible to damage others (and moreover, “it technically isn’t illegal!” is as low as you can set the bar for societally acceptable conduct). Entirely bifurcating sex from emotion and morality, the new-wave feminist movement promised an eternal halcyon era of sexual liberation. Turns out, that had damaging consequences; the normalization Aziz Ansari’s behavior is among them.